five months

real talk time. I miss home. I miss Emily and Anna and Bebe and stacking wood. I miss parking where I want, going barefoot everywhere, doing horse chores, and eating Mom's cooking. what is that you say? yes, I am HOMESICK. I put it in all caps because I am not ashamed to say it. to who you ask? myself. because I write this blog (irregularly of course) to myself. if you're not myself, well then, hello. thanks for stopping by to read this online diary of random happenings in my life ;).

in 23 minutes it will be my 5 month anniversary of living in Boston. I really do like it here. it's been a fantastic experience. and just so I don't forget - 5 things I've learned so far:

1. never leave valuables in car - they will be stolen.

2. buy peanut butter in the big jars

3. drive like a maniac or get driven into by a maniac

4. hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard

5. Jesus is the best

also, I used to think AC was for wimps only. either I was wrong or I'm a wimp because I live next to that thing most days. plus my window doesn't really open because there's a storm window on the other side that I'm afraid to take off. plus if I did take it off all that would enter my room would be stagnate city air. yum! so yes, the AC is my friend. so is Jesus :)

this whole experience has been so stretching for me. I should be quite flexible by the end. learning more about how weak I am as a human being and how much I need God's help every day. with getting work, paying bills, managing time, loving people, making friendships, getting up in the morning, everything! yet I'm always striving to do things on my own and face-planting in the process. I really needed God today. I was so overwhelmed with a client up my butt about her photos, my Dropbox shutting down, figuring out this website deal, editing pics, gazing at my checkbook, being attacked by Mia (our darling cat - who I know have scars from), thinking about my future, not knowing what I'm doing, where I'm going, or who I am... just to name a few.

I finally got outside in a park and laid in the grass so I could look up at that big expanse of blue we call the sky. do you know what I heard?

"as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."(Isaiah 55:9)

Praise. God. I let those words sink into my soul. God isn't trapped in this frail little mind of mine. he's not wrestling with these questions and wondering what to do next. he has everything under control and all I need to do is trust him and follow him, wholeheartedly. I want this so bad. more than anything. what's the point of this life anyway? to get the best job, meet the best guy, live in the best house? no. all those are nice and everything but the point is to glorify God. no matter what you're doing, who you're with or where you live. we're being made more Christ-like everyday, and that IS the most important thing. I need this reminder all the time. God help me relinquish my sense of control over my life and let you live through me. make me more like you. help me rest in the fact that you LOVE me and have a purpose for my life far greater than anything I could dream up. I want to live in the NOW and enjoy what I've been given, right where I am.

I miss home. I miss my family and my friends and my long driveway. but I have a home in Jesus and that is where I find everything I need. in his arms. thank you Daddy. thank you for your faithfulness to me.